One of the number one questions I get asked is: how did you go from being a lawyer to a coach, soul guide and course creator.
The answer is:
It started with a vision.
Much in the same way that I once had a vision to work as a lawyer in one of the big buildings on Bay St. in Toronto as a lawyer and clickity-clack in my heels and pencil skirts on my way to court.
It’s Always Vision First
I learned about manifestation when I was 19, and applied it to my life at the time. What I knew then was that it was important to have a clear vision of where you wanted to be, and so I created one for myself that felt really exciting for me at the time.
When I was 23, I graduated law school and found myself firmly planted in the life I had envisioned.
The issue was…when I arrived, it didn’t feel that amazing.
This was confusing to me for many reasons.
I actually really enjoyed law and the challenge and intellectual stimulation of it. I had an incredible firm with amazing mentorship. I was living in an incredible apartment, had an amazing relationship and was going on all the vacations I had once dreamed of.
Realizing My “Dream” Life Maybe Wasn’t My “Dream” Anymore
I was truly living what had been my “dream” for so long.
And so I couldn’t quite put my finger on what was wrong.
It’s like I felt bored by life, but I couldn’t pinpoint what, exactly, was making me feel bored.
To deal with the stress of not understanding why I wasn’t feeling lit up by my life and the ongoing stress from my law practice, I started to meditate.
Meditation, Mindfulness, Journaling and Opening Up To Spirituality Again Laid the Foundation
In meditation, I started to question my purpose.
I had always had a sense of spirituality in my life, and so I questioned:
“Okay, Universe…if this isn’t what I’m supposed to be doing, what is it?”
I sat with that question for a while. Let myself sit in the mystery, or the “smoke” of that uncertainty for a while.
I set the foundation for the answer to come, though. I started to eat better. Take better care of myself. Began journaling again. Got enough sleep. The usual things.
And then, after the foundation was set, the vision started to become clear.
(This is why month one of Metamorphosis focuses on laying a solid foundation for yourself for the vision to clarify…it always does).
The Questions That Help Create Clarity around Your Purpose
Here are some of the questions that helped me to get a clear vision of what I was going to do next – or what the next part of living my “purpose” would look like.
You might be in a position right now where you feel like you are already living your “purpose” just like I thought law was mine, but you are also feeling bored, lost or disconnected from it.
What I saw in my own life, and have seen in the women that I’ve coached, is that often it’s not about discovering our purpose so much as it’s about letting ourselves evolve.
Evolve into a new level or version of your life, and who you are.
Some of the time this looks like changing careers or building out your passions in another way, for other people it looks like staying where they are, but finding more meaning, depth and happiness there by becoming more of who they are and letting themselves express that more fully.
Sometimes it’s about knowing when things have run their course, and that it’s time to move on to a new vision.
All of it, to me, is an expression of your purpose. Your purpose is to do the work you came here to do, to live in the way your soul intended, and to be who you really are instead of who you are expected to be.
Try Going Through These Questions:
These are some of the questions that I sat with:
- What did I love to do when I was a kid or teenager? What came naturally to me at a young age?
- What are times where you get into a flow state where you lose track of time because you are so immersed in something?
- If there were no rules, how would I structure my day and my life? What would I be doing?
- What is the biggest lesson or learning in my life? What are the moments or challenges that have shaped me the most?
- Who do I see doing something that I feel inspired by?
In going through these questions, I started to see a vision clarify.
Here’s How I Went Through These Questions
What did I love to do when I was a kid or teenager? What came naturally to me at a young age?
As a kid, I absolutely loved reading and writing. As a teenager, I also loved public speaking. I thrived at summer camp teaching skills to the campers in creative ways.
There was some piece around writing, and sharing about what I had read. There was a piece around speaking and sharing my voice. And, a piece about teaching things in creative ways.
The speaking and using my voice part was being well used in law, but the teaching in creative ways, writing and sharing what I was reading wasn’t.
What are times where you get into a flow state where you lose track of time because you are so immersed in something?
Interestingly, my biggest place of flow is in research. Ever since high school, I get consumed by research. I love it.
This was already something that was being well-supported by law, where a lot of legal research is required in litigation, so that was good.
The other place I got into flow was in meditation, in movement, and when journaling. Also, in soulful conversations. I thought that was interesting. Was there a way I could somehow incorporate meditation, movement, journaling and chats into my “purpose”?
If there were no rules, how would I structure my day and my life? What would I be doing?
At the time, the number one thing that drove me bananas was having to wake up early for work.
It just never felt good, even when I had a really great morning routine.
If there were no rules, I would let myself sleep in more, and then go to yoga in the morning, and then begin my day after that.
My two favourite teachers at the time only taught at 9:30am during the weekdays, and I always wondered who, exactly, was making those classes.
If there were no rules, it would be me, and my yoga practice would be on fire and I would be so lit up and happy as a result, and then would start my work-day.
Another thing that bothered me about law was that it assumed that you could bill/work hours regularly. As a woman, my cycle dictates that I go through ebbs and flows of my energy. I got really into the idea of what “feminine leadership” and business could look like, as I think that a lot of our institutions are based around men’s energy as opposed to women’s which tends to peak and valley alongside our cycles.
I know that I have an intense energy force that goes through big waves of “doing” with needing to crash down and rest. I tried to align my life to this when I was in law, but often things get scheduled or are due in a way that’s out of your control.
In addition, I drove my assistant crazy because I would push out so much work for a few days of the month and then pull back to a more reasonable pace.
If there were no rules, I would make my schedule to be more aligned with my cycle, and to allow for my natural waves of creativity and rest, of “doing” and “being.”
The last thing was that I loved to travel and also really struggled with the winter. In December and January I often felt like I was just trying to keep my head above water.
The darker days would accompany more brain fog, and I felt like I had to do *all* the wellness things just to function normally.
I wondered if there was a way that I could spend more time travelling in general, but definitely during the winter.
I saw people working remotely on their laptops so thought it could be possible.
If there were no rules, I would be able to work online whenever I wanted, at least partially, and be able to spend longer periods of time in the sun in the winter.
At the time, in law we weren’t allowed to do that, and litigation especially requires you to be in court or at discovery a lot, but I wondered if I could somehow push those all to a certain time of the year that would allow me to somehow do my other work while away?
What is the biggest lesson or learning in my life? What are the moments or challenges that have shaped me the most?
The biggest lesson or learning of my life was firstly about truly understanding how manifestation worked at a young age, and seeing that if you had a vision and trusted with all of you that it would come to fruition, and took action, it would.
I had already seen it work when it came to getting into law school, the grades I got there, getting my job as a lawyer, manifesting the perfect summer jobs while in school, and all of the guys I dated right off my manifestation lists.
And…I had also learned that unless we create a vision from a place of inner truth, nothing you “manifest” is going to bring you true happiness.
I believe that part of why I created the vision around law had more to do with wanting to chase external “success” than what I really wanted on a deeper level.
I believe that why I manifested a relationship with my ex was that on paper, he is exactly what I thought I wanted and “should” want. That, however, was not actually what was aligned with what I truly wanted, and then went on the same journey to find a relationship that was based on a vision I had created from a heart-centered place of knowing myself in a deeper way.
Both times, these visions for career and love were created when I didn’t know myself as well, and once I was ready to know myself in a deeper way, I was pulled to create a vision for myself that was more aligned with my authentic self as opposed to who I once was, or the expectations of others.
The moments and challenges that had shaped me the most were the ones where I doubted that I would get to the vision – any time I had the vision – and yet every time, would find myself in exactly the vision I wanted. Manifested.
So there was some whole piece around teaching people to find a vision, align with it, use manifestation but also take action.
I sat with that piece a lot and figured out how I might do that.
Another big lesson was once I got to law being so stressed out and feeling like a total imposter. I learned a lot about how to incorporate mindfulness and wellness tools into my practice, and how to overcome my imposter syndrome.
There was another whole piece that was about helping people to incorporate these mindfulness and wellness tools into their busy lives to feel happier and more at ease.
There was another piece around helping others to feel more empowered and work through their imposter syndrome too to own their gifts.
Who do I see doing something that I feel inspired by?
I first came across Gabby Bernstein and was so inspired about what she was doing by teaching people how to live a more authentic, spiritual and awakened life. I wanted to be like her and loved that she was teaching, coaching and guiding other people.
At the time she was hosting retreats, so I went on her retreat to learn more from her and about her. This became my action – any time I saw anyone doing what I wanted to do, I would invest in being around them.
Soon after, I met a woman in Toronto who used to be a consultant but had transitioned to be a life coach named Lindsay Sukorynuk. She was hosting a workshop on vision, and so I went. She then was hosting a retreat in a month, so I went on that. She was then hosting another retreat in Costa Rica, so I also went on that.
On that retreat, I met three other women who inspired me.
Lori Harder, who at the time was running personal growth events, and crushing it as an inspirational speaker, Danette May, who had built her own fitness and wellness empire from the ground up and was such a boss, and Catherine Cowan, who was a healer and yoga instructor based in Toronto who had been making a living that way for the last decade.
All of them in different ways showed me that it was possible for me to make a living by inspiring and encouraging others, and that the world actually needs more women coaching, guiding and helping others to remember their power to be, do or have anything they want for themselves.
I learned so much from these women. Some became close friends. They were all put into my path to show me what was possible for me too.
The people who we see out there doing things that inspire us, or stoke something within us that makes us feel like “I wish I could do that…” are all teachers for us to show us what is possible for us next.
This Allows “Pieces” of Your Vision to Come Together
How It Came Together
As you can see, these questions can lead to a lot of great “puzzle pieces” as I call them.
Your job is to figure out your puzzle pieces first, and then see how they might fit together into a cohesive vision.
Eventually, the vision will become clear, although it’ll change and shift over time as the Universe helps to show you what is actually for you, versus what isn’t.
Then, you take action toward it, while also knowing when to surrender and let things come to you. It’s a balance of the masculine and feminine energies.
And then, you’ll find yourself in that vision.
If You Want To Go Through This Process, Put Together Your Pieces, and Align With Your Purpose
If this feels like something you want to do, then I would love for you to join for the Metamorphosis experience.
I look forward to welcoming you inside!