How to Spend Valentine's Day

Happy Valentine's Day to you!

I hope that your heart has been feeling full lately, and if it hasn't, know that I am sending you love, support, and a gentle reminder that all of the things that you want are already on their way.  

From one of my favourite poets, Rumi: "What you seek is seeking you." 

Further to my last e-mail to you, Valentine's Day used to be a tough one for me.  February is already a pretty dark and bleak month, and then society is going to throw on another layer of expectations and pressures to us?!   

For years, I couldn't figure out what I thought about the day.  I'm such a lover so loved the idea of a whole DAY dedicated to sharing love with everyone, but didn't connect with commercial aspects of it, and didn't know how I wanted to spend it. 

I remember in my last relationships I actually wanted to celebrate Valentine's Day.  Not in a "get me a present and let's devour these chocolates" way - but in a "I really love the idea of acknowledging our love for each other today" way, and I remember my partners were not about it and didn't like the holiday and I always found it a disappointment. In retrospect, I wish I had spoken up so that we could have met in the middle, but I never did. 

So eventually I had to get it together and chose to decide what Valentine's Day means to me.  I've chosen for the last few years to turn the entire month of February into an opportunity to deep-dive into self-connection and love, and have spent the last few Valentine's Days intentionally doing all of the things that light me up.  

We are constantly given opportunities to design what we want our lives to look like and be like, and holidays are not different! You get to choose. 

You do what feels right for you today.  

And then you do what feels right for you in your life.  


Truly, truly - the most loving thing that you can do is give yourself full permission to be who you really are and do the things you really want to do.   

To powerfully step into becoming your true, authentic self - the most radiant, beautiful, aligned, and bursting with love version of you - that is the radical self love. 

To love yourself in the messy, courageous, beautiful, and confusing journey to become the you that you came here to be - that's the radical self-love too. 

Self-love to me is cultivating the courage to be who you really are, to remember your power, and to live in a way that feels magical, while also learning to cultivate gentleness and compassion toward yourself in the process. 

It's also about loving ALL sides of yourself, and learning to be gentle with yourself as you shift, grow, make mistakes, fumble, and rise back up again and again. 

On tonight's Valentine's Day, try:
1. Doing three things that you LOVE to do; 
2. Writing out 5 things that you appreciate about yourself; 
3. Ask yourself: what do I really want right now? And then do that; 
4. Consider if there's something you really want to do but have been avoiding doing because no one will do it with you and then DO THAT THING.